Thoughts From The Inside

May 26th 2023

How kind of them to paint a wall brown, so as to not force constraint upon us within four white walls - so desolate. We must feel comforted by this intentional distinction and yet, my eyes remain frozen ahead, searching desperately in a sea of white for even the most minuscule speck that may distract from the emptiness before me.

When a young sparrow lands on the windowsill, his shadow pulls me from my alienated state and I turn my head slightly to face the umber wall. I watch as his head undulates in inquisitiveness. The passerine carries on in this rhythmic state, and I wonder how he perceives The Inside. It must be that, to the sparrow, I lay alone in a curious white abyss, unmoving and untouched. Maybe he is drawn to the simplicity and stillness…

…but I question why a creature as free as this chooses to waste another moment looking inward on a place such as this - cold and colorless. This momentary trade for something far less beautiful exhumes panic and anger from within me.

I beg you - do not sacrifice your access to vibrance, nor air to breathe without regard, for the sake of curiosity. There are some inflicted with the inability to make that choice. 

And then, with a soft flutter, he was gone.